I suck at bowling

I'm about to go bowling with that dude I met. I hope I don't make a total ass of myself. Last time I went bowling with a guy I accidentally threw the ball behind me and hit my date in the nuts.

Needless to say, that relationship didn't work out.

I wish I had a nickel for every time I wanted to punch someone in the face

and a penny for every time I did.

how i feel about phones

I FUCKING HATE PHONES!!!!!!!!!!!!

All they ever do is ring and it drives me crazy!!!! I am being soooooooo serious! I cannot take the sound of a phone ringing!!!! And I don't want to fucking talk!!!!!!!!!!

The damn phone wouldn't stop ringing today so I kicked it's ass. Take that, phone.

I was going to save this phone for shooting practice, but I couldn't wait that long. It had to go.

This is so much cheaper than therapy.

i made a super-awesome couch

I decided today that one way or another I will have a couch in my living room in my apartment. I'm sick of sitting on the floor. It makes my butt hurt.

Anyway, in a moment of genius a brilliant thought struck me: I could make my own couch! I took an old lounger lawn chair and attached two large dog pillows to it (they were clean). Now I can relax and play my NES in style!

Thank you, brain!!